Be Your Own Kind of "Pretty"
When you don't see your own beauty, no makeup can make you feel one. But when you truly accept yourself, you will feel beautiful all the time.
Do you like the person you see in the mirror?
Are you the person you want to be?
If not, then you’ve got to do something.
I was ugly in my own eyes. When I would look at the mirror, I would only see how thin my hair was, or how big my pores were. I would look in the mirror noticing how short I was. I only stand 5 feet tall. I would look in the mirror and only see how ugly my nose was. I wished my hair was shinier and prettier. I wished my skin was smoother. I wished I was taller. I wished my nose was pointier. I wished I was prettier.
However, people I had met always told me that I actually looked beautiful. I had a great smile when I wasn’t aware of it. But I couldn’t believe them. I always thought it was their way to be polite. After all, other girls were way more beautiful. Every time I was in a crowd, all I could see was how gorgeous other girls were. I even came to the point of spending too much money on skin whitening products and cosmetics. I changed my hair color every three months. First, it was brown. Then, purple. Then, black. Then, blonde, grey, red, then black again. But I was never satisfied. Never. I always asked, “How could I be prettier like the others?”
But as I mature, I realized that I was asking the wrong question. I was already pretty on my own. The real question I had to answer was, “How can I accept my own beauty?”
I became sick and tired of trying to be like everyone else. So, I started doing the things I love. I found that my heart lies in reading books, journaling, and most of all writing. I think there is really some magic in discovering or rediscovering yourself. The moment I immersed myself in the things that I love, I started to realize that those are the things that matter. Not the color of my hair, or the products that I use. My hobbies, the little things that I enjoy in life, as well as the wonderful people I hang out with are the “magical ingredients” to being beautiful. Here is why.
When you do the things that you enjoy or love, you are aligned with yourself. Let me give you an example.
I used to wear clothes that were in trend to look more like the girls on Instagram, Tiktok, or those that we see on social media. I wore mini skirts, mini shorts, fitted jeans, or tops that were kind of revealing, and sort of things. But every time I was outside, I wasn’t really confident and comfortable. I couldn’t move freely. I couldn’t smile comfortably, because I was always anxious about my outfit or my hairstyle. One time, I had lunch with my friends whom I didn’t see for years. For the first time, I tried wearing dangle earrings like the ones I saw on Instagram. It looked great on me, sure. But, I felt so uncomfortable that they swung here and there every time I moved my head slightly. My friends didn’t tell me anything about it, but nobody commented about my earrings that time. Not a compliment or criticism. I guessed they felt awkward about it too. I couldn’t remember anything about that day except my dangling earrings. I missed the amazing moment with my friends.
My point is, when you truly accept yourself, you will feel beautiful all the time. When you embrace your own kind of pretty, you know what clothes best fit you, or what makeup really emphasizes your face. And everything you wear or put on your body would simply match your personality. You would know the people you want to talk with or spend time with, and these people's energies affect you genuinely. They simply add up to your beauty. Then, you would not look like somebody else. You would only look like YOU.
After loving and accepting myself enough, I don’t want to be somebody else. I am so happy being me-my mind, my appearance, and my personality. As for my outside looks, I realized that I feel most comfortable in jeans and a shirt. I also love wearing simple and elegant dresses. Any clothes and accessories that make me feel lighter and look carefree would do. No mini-skirts or mini shorts or very tight jeans. No provocative outfits and heavy makeup for me. It’s just not my style.
This is not to discourage those women from wearing heavy makeup or revealing outfits. Every woman has her own sense of fashion and way of expression (so do men). So, if you are confident and feeling beautiful with your appearance right now, you are on the right track. Let us just not take it too far that our appearance becomes destructive (you know what I mean, girls.) This also goes for men.
Embrace your unique fashion, personality, and ways of expression. Be proud of your skin. Be proud of who you are because when you love yourself inside, it actually radiates outside. That is when people notice how beautiful you really are even without makeup to enhance it.
So the next time you look in the mirror, I hope you see a genuinely beautiful person…in and out.
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Baguio City, Philippines